Where Affection Battles Resentment

He was heading back to the one place he hoped he’d never have to see again. He was heading home. The home in which he spent most of his tumultuous childhood. The home in which he was beaten every other day. The home that made him feel worthless. The home that caged his soul and filled his heart with acid. He has to go because they need him and have nowhere to go. As much as he hates them, in the core of his heart he has nothing but affection. He may not love them, but he cares more than they could ever imagine. He is going back after ten long years. They thought he had abandoned them forever, without realizing all he wanted was just a moment of bliss, a moment in which he didn't have to live up to their expectations and could look up in the blue sky and count the stars instead of burning from within. They never agreed on anything, never understood each other, and never loved each other. It's not that it's completely their fault, as he too was stubborn as hell. But behind all the stubbornness there was a kid who wanted nothing but liberation.But now that kid is long dead, and all that is left is a bitter man who hates others' happiness. He is jealous of everything they have and he doesn't. He is jealous of sportspersons, politicians, artists, businessmen, engineers, doctors, and almost everybody else. The only things that he loves are the stray dogs, cats, and birds. There has been a soft spot for animals in his heart since his childhood, and the birds are what he wishes to be in his next life, as the complexities of adult life are too much for him. For ten years he has lived the life of a soulless robot. He has followed the same pattern over and over again, but it doesn't make him sick. To himself he is just escaping time. He doesn't want to feel its passage even for a single moment. He is already thinking of the answers he would have to give them when he reaches home. Why do you never call? Why aren't you married yet? and God knows how many others. He also realized that he has to make a decision whether to stay with them in that cage for the rest of their lives or bring them to the city, but deep down he knows the first option is not going to work. He has to stay in the city for his work, but just thinking of convincing them to come with him is already giving him a headache, especially his father. Their relationship is as complicated as it can be. He failed his father on almost every step. He was never that good in studies, couldn't crack a single competitive exam, and at last left them when he finally got a decent job.